Younger star Nico Tortorella is in a pretty unconventional relationship. Married to body-neutrality advocate Bethany C. Meyers, the two have been together for 13 years, and theirs is a love story that's more unique and unconventional than others you've heard before.
You see, Tortorella, 30, is sexually fluid and identifies as pansexual, while Meyers, a fitness and lifestyle entrepreneur, identifies as gay.
They have labelled their relationship as "queer polyamorous"—even though they have mixed feelings about labels in general. InTortorella and Meyers shared every detail about their big day in their own words to them.
How nico tortorella and bethany meyers make their unique relationship work
Here, we take a look inside the couple's unconventional relationship, from their views on sexuality to polyamory and whether children are on the cards. They understand that their relationship is difficult for other people to, well, understand—which is exactly why they took the time to describe their wedding day and relationship in their own words. Here's more of what Tortorella and Meyers have said more about their untraditional relationship over the years. Tortorella plays a straight, cisgender character so well on Younger that people are often shocked to learn that he's "sexually fluid" in real life.
Despite having been labelled "sexually fluid" more on that belowTortorella said in an interview with Vulture"I like emotionally fluid more than sexually fluid. There was no assplay at all. It was just dick-to-mouth here.
He was shaken up about it and I was like, 'It's fine. What happened last night doesn't make you the person that you are.
Why are you putting so much weight on it? This unique view on love and sexuality is something Tortorella explores on his podcast, The Love Bomb. Meyers—who was raised in a very conservative, Christian family—told Mind Body Green"By definition, I've been in love with and slept with both men and women, which is 'technically' bisexual.
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I've been with Nico for so long that I can't see myself being with any other man. But I also feel more comfortable with women than men. It's complicated.
Labels that help people understand, but not labels that define us," Meyers wrote in her for them. With open relationships in general, one of the biggest points of interest is how each party deals with jealousy.
In an interview with BuzzFeedTortorella said jealousy was his biggest pet peeve. Then, when Cosmopolitan US followed up, he said it was his "least favourite thing in the world," and was asked to clarify his "cheating philosophy. And I've been in those relationships and sometimes they work, sometimes they don't. But cheating inherently is a terrible thing.
If you're going behind the other person's back and if there's any type of malice, you're a bad person, end of story. In the interview with Mind Body GreenMeyers concurred that "jealously is absolutely the hardest thing. As humans, we want to feel like we're one in our relationships. And at the end of the day, the best you can do is respect those feelings.
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So if my partner says 'I feel jealous,' I make sure to allow them to feel that way and move through it. They also both admitted to The Advocate that jealousy is more likely to kick in if one of them is dating someone of the opposite sex, especially if having kids is on the cards. In the media, Tortorella's sexuality has been labelled differently across different reports—queer, bisexual, pansexual, demisexual and sexually fluid.
And I think labels are really important for kids, especially, [who] can't find their tribe where they are, and need to go find their people, their family.
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For that reason, I think labels are extremely important. So with the labels that currently exist, Tortorella would say he identifies "more of a pansexual," but he doesn't have any issues with being described as bisexual. I'm not going to be the person that's like, 'No, I need a 'P,' I need another letter!
Meyers identifies as gay instead of calling herself a lesbian. Part of me wants to say we're going to move to a label-less society, but I don't know. Maybe [in the future] we'll just have more words. In their post for them.
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The pair recently reaffirmed their feelings towards having kids, saying they believe it will all happen for them in the right time. I think both of us believe that our children will come to us exactly when they're supposed to.
I have dreams about our kids all the time. They're ready, somewhere. And the reason why they work so well together is because they have been through so much together—albeit in their own way. It's hard to break something that bends.