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It could be a race to the finish, in more ways than one. Sometimes, it worked out OK. And other times, it caused problems.

Research suggests that society puts enormous pressure on men to live up to perceived expectations

But Peters said his relationship ran into difficulty because of how his wife handled their disparity in income. His wife did most of the planning and had the last word on managing their lives, Peters said. He only felt they could get back on an equal footing when he earned as much, if not more, than his wife.

Complementary work hours and two higher-earning spouses may help couples juggle parental responsibilities, but will a husband feel emasculated at home if his wife climbs up the corporate ladder at work, and earns more than he does? And, according to the U. Census Bureauthat does make some couples uncomfortable. When a wife makes more than her husband, the income the couple reports for the wife is 1. Men and women who put love ahead of money may be part of a new generation that is breaking away from old-fashioned tropes about who should be the breadwinner. Theories on what helps a couple stay together vary.

Some research suggests that couples are at higher risk of splitting up and less likely to marry when the male partner earns less than the female partner.

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Even inold-fashioned views on marriage prevail. American men are still more comfortable in relationships when they are the breadwinners. Another theory: A persistent glass ceiling for women at work may encourage men to believe they should also be the highest earners at home. Women bring at least half or more of the earnings in almost one-third of cohabiting couples in the U.

Married men still sit on the top of the wage ladder. The wages of married men far surpass those of all other groups: married women, single men and single women. Census Bureau. There are other reasons why more husbands earn more than their wives that have less to do with structural issues like the gender wage gap. Despite being a divorce lawyer, he describes himself as a romantic. Of course, some men are stay-at-home husbands of leisure rather than hard-working stay-at-home d.

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At the other end of the spectrum, it may not behoove men to brag about their earning power before marriage. Men who lead a flashy lifestyle are regarded as being more interested in short-term hook-ups or affairs than marriage, according to a study by Daniel Kruger, a faculty associate at the University of Michigan and Jessica Kruger, a clinical assistant professor at the University at Buffalo in New York, and published in the academic journal Evolutionary Psychological Science.

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In the study, two groups of undergraduate students rated two fictional men on their perceived dating and parenting skills, interest in relationships and attractiveness to others. We must never let him feel like a bonsai in a grove of California redwoods — no, he must always see himself as a towering tree, magnificent in comparison with his female partner.

Times may be changing from the s, albeit at a slower rate than some married couples would like.

Love & money

That suggests that younger couples place a value on equal status. Uncertain economic times and age bring a dose of realism to gender politics at home. For this purpose, investable assets was defined as the value of all cash, savings, mutual funds, CDs, IRAs, stocks, bonds and all other types of investments such as a kband Roth IRA, but excluding a primary home and other real-estate investments. As men and women hit 50 and their salary levels off, that may bring more perspective and humility to the role money plays in their marriage.

This one thing in your marriage increases the risk of divorce by 33%

Men and women acquire more experience the longer they work and, therefore, become more valuable and productive. After 50, however, they either slow down and learn fewer new skills, economists say, or they are competing with younger, less expensive but equally skilled, employees for the same jobs. Some men are more concerned with their financial future than their egos. He, for one, would be much happier if his girlfriend had a higher salary and owned more real estate and other investments.

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